Earth's Broken Things.

Christ is building His kingdom with earth's broken things. Men want only the strong, the successful, the victorious, the unbroken, in building their kingdoms; but God is the God of the unsuccessful, of those who have failed. Heaven is filling with earth's broken lives, and there is no bruised reed that Christ cannot take and restore to glorious blessedness and beauty. He can take the life crushed by pain or sorrow and make it into a harp whose music shall be all praise. He can lift earth's saddest failure up to heaven's glory.
--J. R. Miller

I'm going through a difficult time right now. I can't chalk it up to only one thing; it feels like everything is being shaken and though I know God has a purpose in this, my human mind struggles for understanding. I know I'm not alone. I've spoken with 5 or 6 others who are dealing with their own situations and I do take comfort in that.....that doesn't sound good. I don't take comfort in others problems, just in knowing that I'm not alone.

I grew up with this beautiful, vivacious, bubbly girl......lets call her Betty. Betty and I weren't "best friends" or anything, but we lived close to one another and our sisters were close. Betty was a grade higher than me and we had a different group of friends but we were in the school band together and CGIT. Growing up on a small island in Northern Ontario means if folks aren't family, they're friends (or end up family unless you marry a non-islander like I did). We keep in touch and when I'm "home" I like to pop in and say hi.

Betty has a beautiful big smile and a great sense of humour. What makes her truly remarkable to me is her positive attitude; though she was never blessed with a child of her own she has always been excited when we've brought another new one for her to meet. Never have I sensed her holding back in her sincerity at welcoming a new baby; never have I questioned whether or not I should bring my babe for her to see. To this day, despite the fact that I've moved several times and had more children, Betty still sends her warm regards that can be felt through the world-wide-web. I know that there were many prayers offered up both by and for her; I don't know personally of the pain she endured; of the questioning that had to go on as she walked through that dark time in her life AND YET she walked through it holding fast to the only One who had any hope of filling the child-shaped void. Betty was pregnant once and miscarred; today marks the 12th anniversary of her due date. I know this day will hold memories for her, but she stands as a witness to me of what God does with one of his broken things.

I'm a Christian - a "follower of Christ" and, like all of us, I've had to deal with life's difficulties. Despite the experiences I've had and the lessons I thought I'd learned, when these circumstances arise my first reaction is most often one of dismay. Once the shock wears off and the emotions clear, then I remember that God allows in his wisdom and love what he could easily prevent by his power and I'm left again with the question of who I trust; who is in control.

Here I am......again. This place is familiar; I've been here before though I really wish I could get it all done in one shot. It took some time but I did find myself a few times over the past week amidst the tears thanking God for where I'm at.

Broken again.